anatomy of a catalyst

my death
has nothing to do
with the .45 in my hand

the correlation
of my index finger
to the screams
of the amusement park

the soul
exiting through a puncture
of the skin

the red and blue lights
wavering along the walls

the random bodies
leading to where i am
having bled out hours ago

and even a mascot
a human being
dead within a cat costume
the likeness of a cartoon cat
personified with human stature and traits

define irony.

all the negotiating mumbo jumbo
bellowed through a megaphone

the small group of people
who are sitting on the asphalt
in front of me

they all fear for their lives

i remember
a seven year old girl
asking me why i looked so sad

i remember pluto

i remember
the pawn shop
and its thirty day waiting period

i remember being happy

i remember suffering

i remember
samael

there are not enough stars in the sky
to brighten this world