Noah Ferrer

Death

Was the empty aluminum cans

In an suv

Ruunning the red light

It was the crunching sound of metal

And tires screeching

Death was glass like stars

And a street lamp descending

Fallen

Shattered

Destroyed

A family destroyed

My friend destroyed

And eleven year old Noah Ferrer

Gone from this world

At 12:26am

(K)no(w) Life

There are living organs

Beneath it's skin

There are aspirations and sciences

And well developed lexicons

That it acknowledges and lives by

But it lives it's life in spurts

Between traffic jams

And red lights

And waiting rooms

And jail cells

And court ordered therapy groups

Waiting for its sparse little moments

Tiny windows of time

Where even if by only the flicker of a clock

The animal might show itself

But then

It would be back to

Standing in line

For the espresso it craved all morning

There is no life

Here

Pray the sun explodes

Become the ocean

Kill everything that you are

Kemperesque

when skin turns
a biopsy reveals
sparkling polaris

curious teeth in the shelterbelt

a war drum
is just an instrument

the human animal
licks it's jowls

and a garbage disposal gurgles
with torn esophagus

the womb is a sunburst
in outer layer
a cavity on the inside

a living, breathing wound

all static is just noise
schizophrenic to panoramic
coming in through every pore

laying dead
and half eaten
on the kitchen floor

Nile

She smiles with alexandria to luxor
And in my arms with alexandria to luxor

And the whole world from alexandria
To luxor

And her scent is calming
Her beautiful hair


Hair
As long as the nile

From alexandria to luxor

Coveted girl
Beautiful girl

Mai tai girl
Fiddling with

Sand
Turned to glass
Somewhere in the desert

Vague

i can only see myself through

someone else's eyes.

A Prayer

Your finger lingers

The stinger hypodermic

Rosary beads

For the heart

And it's

Remora, the aorta

I had never seen him cry before

Scared with

Sparkling child's eyes

Where the tile is white as nothing

Im prowling in a nocturne

With anesthetics for urns

And they'll cut open his chest tomorrow

And they'll do things to his heart

And I'm scared

Please

Don't take my grandpa.

Exit

My eyes are so heavy

And the road in front of me

Is like time lapse footage

Miles of black ribbon

Disappearing under the tires

Little flash frames

Between zoning out

And coming to

An uneasy Schumann on the radio

I think about hospitals and clean white tile

The rhythm of a lifeline

The date of expiration

And I realize

The center divider is a better exit

Than any off ramp

I want to die screaming

Happiness

the ghetto flowers

could swallow an airplane

with those butterfly eyes

flickering like they're caught

between radio stations

the brevity of ghosts

twisting off my lips

vanishing as they always do

some things are expected

a little roman finds a mark antony

and we watch airplanes

traveling into the orange forever-long

the color of goodbyes

the day expiring and losing complexion

butterflies will die

and when the C battery explodes

(the one i was told not to put in the fire)

stars will rain down

(in a 30 ft radius)

and I will be scraped and I will be burned

and I will be

happy

Thought(less)+ness

The sound of paper balls

Tumbling about outside my van window

They're like eyeballs

Without pupils

They're stillborn thoughts

Premature and not yet ready to live

Dead things in the breeze

Whirling against the alley wall

My pen drips ink and it is

Milk dripping from a wet nurse

To nourish the asphalt

And all its urine stains, condom wrappers,

Gum spots dried and blackened

A bit of wasted life

And I am searching now

Maybe for something I can relate to

Something I can wrap my head around

Something real

"is this real?"

I jot it down

Stare at it for a moment

Then I crumple it up

And I toss it out the window

IX (cor)

I have little faith anymore

I taste like nothing

I move like air

I am beauty

Swallowed up and then passed

Feeling forever

Without her

Feeling one horseman shy

Of a sky

In flames

Ingesting all poisons

To fill the cavity beneath my rib cage

Bryan is gone

All sunrises gone

All feeling gone

And he is never coming back

Not Even Worms

Your mouth is opened so wide

Your eyes are so shiny with tears

You're screaming

But I can't hear you

Over mozart's Jupiter

My ear buds nestled in nice and tight

Dragging the exacto knife

From just below your sternum

Trailing down between your labia

I have wondered some things

I have wondered

If I could stomach torturing you

But i wonder more wether or not

The soil could stomach

Your vile taste

Neola

Down a set of stairs

Like the vertebrae

Of freeway fatalities

A reminder

In satellites

Of elongated

Last syllables

Of words

You could have been her twin

Of the tongue

Danced a hearse

Dipped and then cursed

As titan

Did ascend